SoftBank 2026 AGM [pdf]

(group.softbank)

56 points | by dmmalam 9 hours ago

11 comments

  • Michelangelo11 6 hours ago
    I love how in the slide with "It was the goose that created value", the goose has its wings raised. The goose is ... triumphant. Ascendant. Its arc is complete: after being valued at $0, the goose is recognized for the inexhaustible source of value it is. The goose is vindicated.

    And finally, in the denouement, we see the goose in serene repose. "It is the Goose itself," we are told, in bold, confident lettering. This is what matters. Not the eggs.

    I hope lasagnacat can come back, do a special on this, and hire John Barrymore for the narration, as a spiritual sequel to their Pipe Strip video (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=NAh9oLs67Cw).

  • usagisushi 5 hours ago
    Back in 2014, Son also gave me a good laugh with a slide comparing:

    > Von Neumann computer: powered by programming vs. Personal robot: powered by family happiness. https://i.gzn.jp/img/2014/06/05/softbank-conference/snap3014...

    His sense of humor has only reached new heights since then.

  • fairity 3 hours ago
    Here's the talk that went along with this deck (for those who would prefer not immediately jumping to ridicule): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtM0Cjb0dEU
  • JdeBP 5 hours ago
    If your reaction is 'What the Hell is this?', read this for background:

    * https://reuters.com/business/media-telecom/talk-bubble-is-an...

    Then notice that the metal construction robot needs toe protectors on its boots.

    Then notice that the slides have small print.

    • wunderlotus 29 minutes ago
      > One shareholder, who described herself as a "simple housewife," asked Son to nominate her son to the board of directors.

      "You have great vision and skill," she said. "I would like my son to become like you."

      "I'll keep that in mind," Son replied.

      Goose matters aside, this was my favorite part.

  • dgellow 7 hours ago
    Pure trolling as a strategy...

    Golden quotes:

    "It was the goose that created value: 74 - 3 = 71"[0]

    "Golden Egg factory inside the goose"[1]

    0: see page 49

    1: see page 55

  • shigawire 4 hours ago
    This makes me feel like a spend too much time on slides for my rinky dink enterprise software feature projects.
  • NeutralForest 5 hours ago
    The only thing I got from the presentation is that I still underrate geese, gotta put some respect on their feathered name.
  • stosssik 6 hours ago
    Original approach for their annual shareholder decks. I liek that.
  • netless 4 hours ago
    Surreal
  • bebeal 1 hour ago
    what the fuck is this lmao
  • neonstatic 5 hours ago
    When slop meets stock photos
    • aabhay 4 hours ago
      I think the beauty of this is that you know it can’t possibly have been ai generated